Friday, February 27, 2004

Fafblog's journey to wondrous and foreign countries continues! You can see all our previous trips to Canada the Holy Land Iraq Europe the Moon and the office building. Fafblog boldly blogs where no one has blogged before. Or where others have blogged before but with arguably less panache. Fafblog has so! much! panache!

The mall is a bright and welcoming land. As I enter the country I am greeted not by guards or by terrorist searches but by a giant person in a pink bear suit bearing coupons for candy. This is a wonderful idea! Why don't we have pink bear suits at US customs! I would get stopped less by them I bet.

Paris has been called the City of Lights but y'know it has nothing on the mall, which is full of wonderful twinkling shiny things and music that floats serenely through the air in a comforting loop. I know that the mall will always be here to welcome me and love me just like I know that the electrosynth version of Pachelbel's canon plays every 56 minutes.

And the food! The mall has a luxurious Court of Food where a veritable panopoly of cuisine internationale is ready and available from Chinese to Italian to Other Chinese to Tacos to Chicken In A Box to Arby's! I have been all over the world but no other land embraces the cosmopolitan spirit like the mall.

The center of the mall is Holiday Village which is presided over by the Holiday Man. Sometimes he is a giant rabbit! Sometimes he is a terrifying Santa Claus. Sometimes he is an information booth! I go up to the Holiday Man and ask him where I can purchase a purple umbrella, he is quite helpful.

Mallians are very spiritual people. They are not interested in the acquisition of physical things. They are interested in the acquisition of spiritual things shaped like physical things. But the best thing about mall people is that they are open to a variety of spiritual enlightenment, not limiting themselves to yknow just cds or clothes or pizzas but cds and clothes and pizzas from different stores, too. They are sort of like Unitarians that way, or maybe Quakers or the B'hai, only with extra greed.

"Is this right?" one of them asks in a shop holdin up a book or a Magic 8-ball or a sandwich. I do not know mall person - only you in your own inner journey can decide if that is right for you. And that journey may take a lifetime.
posted by fafnir at 3:57 PM



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