Monday, February 14, 2005
"Giblets is the enemy of love!" says Giblets with his anti-love arsenal. "He will hunt it and kill it and mount its head upon his wall!"
"I dunno Giblets," says me. "I'm thinkin maybe this doesn't have as much to do with love as it's got to do with you gettin dumped again by Noodles."
"She will come crawling back to Giblets!" says Giblets. "She will come crawling back to Giblets NOOOOW!"
"There's plenty a women in the sea," says me. "Like mermaids an naiads an squidladies."
"Keep your half-octopus females to yourself!" says Giblets. "All they wanna do is digest Giblets and turn him into ink."
"A good woman is like a fine cheese," says me. "Or a large hat. Or an aggrieved sasquatch. Or an elephant made outta trees an ropes an lotsa smaller elephants."
"Giblets never wants to see another elephant again!" says Giblets. "He is done with them and their cheating hearts! He is burning all pianos!"
"But you love the elephants," says me. "You can't live with em an you can't live without em."
"Cause they tear out your liver an brains an replace em with the fungal herbs of the undead," says Giblets.
"Women like zombies on accounta their drive," says me. "Zombies keep their eyes on the prize an the prize is eatin brains."
"Yes very goal-oriented," says Giblets. "But what of the robots! With their laser-mounted death beams an their single-track extermination programming they sweep the ladies off their feet!"
"In the battle a robots an zombies everybody loses," says me. "That's why all sides have to work together to end the robot-zombie arms race."
"You talk madness, we need the robots to keep the zombies at bay!" says Giblets. "There's no goin back once the robot-zombie genie's outta the bottle!"
"That kinda thinkin won't protect us from zombies or robots," says me. "It'll only lead to mutually assured zombification."
"That's just a price we'll have to pay to win the war," says Giblets.
"The war of love," says me.
posted by fafnir at 11:19 AM