Thursday, December 30, 2004

  • tell anyone "you can't fire me, I quit!" before anyone has actually fired me or made me quit
  • spend the first two genie wishes on "make me a monkey" or "now make him dance"
  • vote for a constitutional amendment before I know whose rights it strips away
  • send Santa letters to the president
  • send Santa letters to Secret Service agents replying to the Santa letters to the president
  • mix mercury and insecticide. very bad! mercury goes in the green fish, insecticide goes in the red fish. keep our chemicals sorted.
  • forget whether torture is "good" or "bad" during a presidential election
  • freely substitute Cool-Whip and shaving cream
  • reelect George Bush, then patiently wait for him to radically change his foreign and domestic policy
  • open my eyes at any time; the scary part does not end

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  • posted by fafnir at 9:49 PM




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