Friday, December 31, 2004

Some old dead guy once said that a year is a feast of days that we should savor one by one. If that's true then somebody already got to 2004 before Giblets did, probably a large foul-smelling barnyard animal, and it is now sitting in a steaming pile of crap on Giblets's front porch.

Giblets was even less satisfied with 2004 than he was by 2003. Where was Giblets's money! His power! His rap video mansions with their multitudes of ass-cheek-bearing hos! Instead Giblets saw debt and stupidity and headaches and annoying people and sickness and unemployment! Instead of a bountiful harvest of fanciful delights Giblets was presented with a veritable smorgasbord of pungent aromatic mastodon feces!

And Giblets is not alone! What has 2004 done for anyone? Democrats got to get whupped by Republicans. Republicans got to completely sell out everything it means to be a Republican. Iraqis got to get tortured, blown up, and shot at. American troops got to get blown up, shot at, and stuck in Iraq underpaid. Doves got a war they didn't like. Hawks got to not like the war. Gays got marriage rights - in Massachusetts - at least a hundred and thirty six years late. The religious right got to stomp all over gays and watch Jim Caviezel get nailed to a cross. Did it make them feel any better? Does anything make them feel any better?

George Bush? Yeah, okay, so he had a fun time. Happy New Year, George.

The best Giblets can say is it's over. It was a magnificent and overwhelming festival of crapulence, but Giblets choked it down in the largest gulps he could. He awaits the next foul swollen circus monstrosity whose excrement of days lumbers towards us! Fuck you, 2004! And fuck 2005, while we're at it. Giblets is taking no chances.

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posted by Giblets at 10:40 PM




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