Wednesday, October 27, 2004

This is a fat pie. It is a huge pie. It is a pie that has been exposed to mysterious cosmic rays maybe or has gone on a terrible rampage an eaten hundreds of smaller weaker pies an is now bloated from its feedin frenzy or is a strange an mysterious genetic throwback to the times when giant pies ruled the earth. But it is still a pie.

This is a pie made a birds. It is not a pleasant fluffy pie of fruit an sweet goo. It's pie stuffed with bird. It will taste like birds when you eat it. Do you like birds? Great we like them too, you will like this pie! Do you like the taste of birds? Then you will like this pie even more.

Some people go "Oh these pies are unnatural pies! Oh, they defy the laws of pie an nature!" But a pie is a pie, and so are these pies. The chocolate spinach pie. The rhubarb ostrich pie. Even the okra tofu pie. Prick them, will they not bleed tasty filling? Eat them, will they not be delicious - to someone, somewhere? They are all children of a merciful an loving Piemaker-God.

"Not true!" you say. "God only intended Godly, natural pies for our consumption - and none of this mixing pies with cake!" You form committees and parent-teacher organizations. You form PACs with names like "Concerned Pie-eaters of America" an "American Families for the Protection of Family Pies" an "Family Family Concern Family Family America Family" an you organize whole social movements around which pies are acceptable to eat an which pies are only eaten by blasphemers of nature an how much nutmeg makes you either one. You are bein very silly an dumb an should probably lie down. Rest a little. Have some pie. It's all good. Dig in.

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posted by fafnir at 8:22 PM




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