Thursday, September 23, 2004
There is a voice an some jinglin bells comin down from the chimney. "Oh no!" says me. "Santa!"
"Ho ho ho!" says the fat man in the chimney with the jolly green suit. "Don't be afraid little Fafnir! It's not ordinary Santa - it's me, Supply-Side Santa, come to fill your home with Christmas cheer!"
"Oh wow!" says me. "But Supply-Side Santa it is not Christmas yet, it is only September."
"Oh ho ho, but Fafnir, every day is Christmas for Supply-Side Santa!" says Supply-Side Santa. "Now, have you been a rich little boy this year?"
"I have saved an saved," says me, "an I have three dollars sixty-two cents an a rice krispie treat! Do I get a present?"
"Actually, Fafnir, I'm here to take your old presents!" says Supply-Side Santa. "Supply-Side Santa gave all his presents away to super-rich children, and that didn't come cheap! Now Supply-Side Santa has to take your model airplane and your teddy bear to finance future Christmases."
"Awwwww," says me. "Supply-Side Christmas is ruined."
"Why, that's not true at all!" says Supply-Side Santa. "Because eventually those super-rich children will pass down their presents to less-rich children, who will pass them down to you, thus growing the Christmas spirit!"
"Wow! Everybody wins!" says me. "It's a Christmas miracle!"
"Almost as much of a miracle as Social Security privatization!" says Supply-Side Santa. "Someday your payroll taxes won't just pay for your granddad's retirement. They'll pay for your retirement, too - through the miracle of Christmas Spirit!"
"But Santa if I'm payin taxes for Grampa Fafnir's retirement an they change it so I'm payin taxes for my own retirement where will we get the money to keep retirin old people like him?" says me.
"Ho ho! That's simple, Fafnir!" says Supply-Side Santa. "It'll be made by elves - the same elves who'll cut the deficit in half in four years!"
"That's great Supply-Side Santa!" says me. "I will be waitin right here by the chimney for my presents an Social Security benefits!"
"Oh ho ho! Don't hold your breath now!" says Supply-Side Santa while he's takin my stuff in the name a Christmas cheer. "These things sometimes take a while."
"It's OK," says me. "I'm still waitin for Supply-Side Christmas from a couple years ago an I still haven't given up!"
"Good for you, Fafnir!" says Supply-Side Santa with a twinkle in his eye as he jumps in the fireplace. "Merry tax cuts to all, and to all a good night!"
posted by fafnir at 7:47 AM