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Saturday, May 29, 2004
JESUS CHRIST is the author of a number of popular self-help books and recipe collections. He lives in Berkeley with his wife and their three children.
FAFBLOG: This is a really delicious corndog Jesus. JESUS CHRIST: Yeah, I like corndogs. FB: Y'know I heard that in California they have these corndog stands where they will make a corndog for you right there, fresh on a stick, and it is a fresh corndog, and it is the most delicious thing in the world? JC: That's gotta be a damn tasty corndog. FB: It is the Shangri-la of all corndogs. Now Jesus what do You think about gay marriage? JC: In my time I was strongly opposed to the practice of divorce. Divorce is rampant in America between heterosexual couples. I don't understand how barring more couples from marrying is "defending" marriage. FB: That sounds kinda squishy Jesus. JC: Maybe it is. FB: Intelligent Design is the latest hippest craze sweepin our schools. Should we replace teachin natural selection with Intelligent Design, or teach them both next to each other? JC: I think natural selection itself seems like a pretty intelligent design. FB: You are not givin me a lot of red meat here Jesus. JC: I'm sorry. FB: You would never make it on Hardball is all I'm sayin. Jesus who do You like in the next election? JC: I really don't like giving political endorsements, Fafnir. FB: C'mooooon Jesus! I wanna know who God wants me to voooooote for! JC: I'd rather not. I'm actually a big supporter of the separation of church and state. Give unto Caesar that which is Caesar's, and give unto God that which is God's. FB: Does that which is God's include a preference for John Kerry's veep pick? JC: No. FB: Awwwww. JC: Y'know, Fafnir, a lot of people really got the wrong idea about me when I came here. They thought I was all about gaining temporal power, about building a kingdom on earth. But it was the devil who offered me the opportunity to rule the world, and I turned that down. I told my followers that I wasn't there to build an empire, but even after I died they fought wars to expand empires that ruled in my name. FB: So what is Your position on the Iraq war Jesus? Does the Holy Spirit have an exit strategy? JC: I think you're missing the point. Acquiring earthly power for the sake of the church, making laws in my name - it's the last thing I want. I told them my kingdom was not of this world. FB: Is it on the moon? JC: It's - FB: 'Cause we're goin to the moon again Jesus! JC: [sighs] FB: It'll be awesome! JC: Yes, Fafnir. My kingdom is on the moon. FB: That's so great! Jesus and the moon, together at last. Are there robots in the kingdom of heaven, Jesus? JC: Sure. Why not. Labels: interviews
posted by fafnir at 4:46 AM
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