Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Back in a bit.


posted by fafnir at 11:03 AM

Well, if you got the drones and cajones, you got the makings of a tasty Occu Pie. And let the record show that I would never stand between Giblets and his pie. But, meaning no disrespect or nothing you understand, if you're making a Territory Occu Pie the territory seems to end up trashed so badly that you can't afford to fix it back up. It's a Pyrrhic Purchase. Kind of like foreclosing on a house by ripping the foundation out from under it.
Where to, Magoo?


Would the Medium Lobster care to weigh in? Will Teh Left rebut? Will vowels be properly accented?
by Anonymous Anonymous, at November 09, 2011 12:00 AM
Dear Anonymous

1. Not that it's any of your beeswax, but the Medium Lobster is a Medium Lobster weighing pretty much what the other Mediums do.

2.Your assay at that link has many fine words, you should be proud you wrote them all, but the font is too big and hurts my eyes.

3. Only if they're Merican vowels.
The picture reminds me of a poem, sometimes recited by my late father of blessed memory, even in the last years of his long life. He learned it in the early part of the twentieth century, as a Canadian schoolboy. It appears in the 1909 edition of The Ontario Readers Second Book. I regret that I have been unable to find any more information about the poem or the author. You will note that, unlike the frogs in the drawing here, the frog in the poem had never read anything. Some learn from the experience of others, while others can draw conclusions only from events they encounter themselves.

The Daring Froggie
-- by James Clarence Hawer --

Once upon a time
On the border of a brook,
A wicked little froggie,
Who had never read a book --

Who had never read a story,
Or a funny little rhyme,
Had a sad and tragic ending,
Once upon a time.

This little froggie, sad to say,
Was very fond of flies,
And thought on this unlucky day
That he had found a prize.

"Up, up I go," said Froggie,
"I can climb as well as hop;
I only hope he'll stay right there
Until I reach the top."

"I wish this wouldn't bend so much."
Said Froggie, going higher;
"I wish that flies would shut their eyes
And come a little nigher.

But he is such a good one
And he looks so very fine,
I think I must have him,
For it's time for me to dine."

So up he went regardless
Of the danger he was in;
He saw a duck below him,
But he didn't care a pin;

Till suddenly behind his back
The reed began to crack.
And all he heard was just one word --
And that one word was "Quack!"


Nicole tells us, at her Pinch My Salt blog,

I’ve had a couple of requests for this recipe and I think it’s something that everyone needs to try once! Don’t let the main ingredient fool you, this is one of my all-time favorite desserts!

This is a pie that my mom used to make and we grew up calling it “Frog Pie.” We would never tell our friends that the pie was made from an avocado. For whatever reason, “Frog Pie” sounded more appetizing than “Avocado Pie” to the other kids! The real name is Jagger Pie although I have no idea what that means or where the recipe originally came from.

Jagger Pie

1 medium Hass avocado
1 can Eagle Brand sweetened condensed milk
3 1/2 oz. fresh squeezed lemon juice
graham cracker pie crust made with brown sugar (use recipe on box of graham crackers)
heavy (whipping) cream, whipped without sugar

In blender, mix avocado and milk thoroughly then blend in lemon juice. Pour immediately into pie crust (it starts setting up fast). Top with unsweetened whipped cream (The pie is so sweet that the unsweetened cream is a nice balance) and refrigerate for a few hours. Hope you enjoy it!
Two Frogs
Sittin' In A Tree
Today, November 11, is the Fall Holiday in Honor of War. In the cycle of the seasons, it is preceded by the Summer Holiday in Honor of War (July 4), and the Spring Holiday in Honor of War (Memorial Day, the last Monday in May). But where is the Winter Holiday in Honor of War? I propose rebranding February 14 as My Soldier Valentine's Day. Cupid, in addition to carrying his bow and arrows, should wear a helmet. "Wish you were here" is an especially poignant sentiment when expressed to OR by a war fighter out occupyin' overseas to kill foreigners. The archetypal intensity of Love and Death can drive 10,000 dramas, comedies, performance competitions, and reality shows.

By the way, Kurt Vonnegut would have been 89 today.
Can you really make a pie that is untainted by the slavery and slaughter of animals? Apparently so - something else to be thankful for as the holiday season approaches and we strive to cultivate an attitude of gratitude.

With best wishes,
Fannie Farmer (Mrs.)


Can You Bake a Vegan Pie?

“There are few moments in life that can’t be improved with pie,” write Isa Chandra Moskowitz and Terry Hope Romero, authors of the new cookbook “Vegan Pie in the Sky: 75 Out-of-This-World Recipes for Pies, Tarts, Cobblers and More” (Da Capo Press).

Perhaps more than any other holiday, Thanksgiving is associated with warm home-baked pies. For many vegetarian diners who don’t eat dairy or eggs, though, the holiday pie is off limits. But home cooks will soon discover that they don’t have to sacrifice flavor when baking a vegan pie. Traditional fruit-pie fillings often meet the requirements of a vegan diet anyway; mashed bananas, silken tofu and almond milk add plenty of creaminess to a pudding or cream pie. And traditional pie makers will be wowed by the flavor and flakiness of an olive-oil crust.

The Well Vegetarian Thanksgiving series is offering three delicious pie recipes from “Vegan Pie in the Sky,” all certain to satisfy everyone at the holiday table. Below you’ll find recipes for a pumpkin cheesecake pie, a fruity and tart “appleberry” pie and an old-fashioned chocolate pudding pie, as well as recipes for an olive-oil double crust and a graham cracker crust.

For the rest, see

C'mon. Fans of Fafnir ought to remember Arnold Lobel!
by Anonymous Jeremiah Edward Cornelius, at November 15, 2011 8:48 PM
Pepper Spray Recipe
To make 100mL of pepper spray, follow the directions below.
Get 100g hot chili powder, and 200mL ethanol.
Mix the two together in a container.
Run the mixture through a sieve to make sure there's no solid chili powder left, and then put it in a stove-burner-safe container.
Put your container on the burner until the ethanol boils and evapourates. You'll have an orange solution of wax consistency left.
Now add 20mL of baby oil, or (depending on the chili. Because consistencies can vary, make sure you have a viscous liquid.
Now you can put it in a bottle. You can buy spray bottles at any department store, or buy self-aerosolizing bottles online for a professional solution
So, mix half a cup a chili powder into a cup a grain alcohol, wait, strain and reduce. (Hopefully you're gonna boil off that alcohol outdoors, while you stay upwind of the pepper fumes.)
Then yer gonna add 4 teaspoons baby oil?
My Gawd, aa, that's gonna taste horrible! Any dish you try to spice up with that spray will be ruined. Couldn't you use Olive or Canola oil instead? An maybe chop up a half dozen habaneros plus a couple tablespoons crushed pequin peppers instead of that wussy generic chili powder?
Pepper Vodka

Total time: 168 hours 5 minutes


2 tablespoons peppercorns, slightly cracked
1 (750-ml) bottle of vodka


Add the peppercorns to the vodka and allow to sit in a cool dark place for 7 days. Stir or gently shake to combine every few days. After 7 days, strain through a fine mesh strainer to remove the peppercorns. Place in a sterilized glass container with a lid and store in a cool dark place.
I like scotch bonnet peppers for my pepper spray, it ups the Scoville measure significantly and give the rioters a nice Carribean flavour.
I'd like to be funny and cynical, but I work in downtown Oaktown, directly across from Snow Park, and I've watched a lot of polizei doing polizei things, and helicopters.

There's nothing funny about helicopters. Nothing funny about pepper spray, either -- though the Polizei could be sprayed with 'Dr. Pepper', I guess -- sort of Performance Art Irony vs. Chemical Weapons and truncheons.
Okay. I went out and got more cheerful.

's The Holiday Season™, ya know.
I had lemon pie today.
Lemon Pie Today
Recipe: (1) crust (bought) (2) filling (made)
Put one of these in the other the day before (2 options, but only 1 makes pie). Bake until done.
Next step is the tricky one: let sit 24 hours (suggestion: do something you have to do anyway - this includes sleeping).

Takes a long time, depending on when you buy the crust.
I'm having lemon pie tomorrow, left over.
Lemon Pie Tomorrow, Left Over
Recipe: (1) half-eaten lemon pie.
Do not eat (do something else instead, maybe read a blog, oh there isn't one yet is there, oh well).
May be eaten on the morrow.

Hey my capcha is "dinner" I kid you not.


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