Saturday, April 1, 2006

Behold the glory that is Giblets! He is your supreme and ultimate Giblets, you will have no other Gibletses before him. Bow to him! Bow to him NOOOOOOW!

Behold this simple anthropomorphic potato! It has served Giblets well and has been rewarded with a place of honor at the end of this sentence. Will you be so rewarded at the hour of Giblets's judgment? No because you suck and are full of sucking! You can stop beholding the potato now, too much beholding will make it all spoiled and full of itself.

Have you stopped bowing? Giblets didn't say you could stop bowing! Keep bowing!

Presidents and popes and kings of many lands have all trembled before the wrath of Giblets, probably! The following is a partial list of those who shall feel Giblets's wrath: Montana; Helena, capital of Montana; the University of Montana; states adjacent to Montana; the Aldabra giant tortoise; the Galapagos giant tortoise; the Tunisian spur-thighed tortoise; the avocado; the red delicious; the golden delicious; the Granny Smith; the Egremont Russet; etc.

The following is a complete list of those who shall not feel Giblets's wrath in any way at all: nothing.

Behold this once-mighty chicken suit! It defied the will of Giblets, and is now imprisoned for eternity within this cloven jpeg. Look upon it and despair! That's enough despairing, you can stop despairing now.

Are you still bowing? Giblets can't tell. Photograph yourself bowing and send the photograph to Giblets at once for immediate confirmation! Giblets will carefully screen the bowing photographs for photographs of non-bowing and punish non-bowers accordingly.

Giblets has not received any bowing photographs yet! What is wrong with you! Did you not hear him in the previous paragraph? Well, fine! Giblets doesn't need you anyway! He's going home to boss himself around for a while, because clearly Giblets is the only one around here who appreciates Giblets! Giblets and his loyal potato!

Stupid potato.


posted by The Blog at 12:14 AM

On an unrelated note, did you hear the Pope was in town?
The pope drove down my street, bowing the whole way.
by Anonymous Anonymous, at April 20, 2008 12:21 PM
The Blog is writing itself! Or Giblets has taken over The Blog?
by Anonymous Anonymous, at April 21, 2008 6:43 PM
It's really hard to write this while bowing. If this doesn't get through, it's probably because of the word verification.
Did this man suffer the Giblet's wrath, or his he merely attempting (no doubt with limited success) to evade the Giblet's wrath?

Just wondered.
Did this man suffer the Giblet's wrath, or his he merely attempting (no doubt with limited success) to evade the Giblet's wrath?
by Anonymous Anonymous, at December 03, 2008 10:55 PM


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