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Tuesday, September 27, 2005
As inconceivable as it sounds, Giblets is outraged yet again!
With fears mounting that high energy costs will crimp economic growth, President Bush called on Americans yesterday to conserve gasoline by driving less. He also issued a directive for all federal agencies to cut their own energy use and to encourage employees to use public transportation. ...The fool! This kind of environmental appeasement is just what the weather wants! If America caves on its proud tradition of oil gluttony it will just encourage more hurricanes! Then what will the clouds come for next? Our proud tradition of belching smog? Our rich and diverse output of greenhouse gases? When will it end! Fortunately Giblets has developed plans to keep America strong and oil-fat well into the future: SHORT TERM: suck oil out of neighboring countries's gas tanks while they're paying at the register MEDIUM TERM: explore new sources of oil in Alaska, Iraq, and the Moon LONG TERM: find more dinosaurs and lure them into tar pits to make more oil There you have it: a comprehensive strategy for energy dependence. Stay the course, America, or the environment has already won! Labels: our world and how to kill it
posted by Giblets at 7:19 PM
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