Wednesday, July 6, 2005

An we're runnin past the fireball an jumpin on the alligator heads an the ninjas are right behind us an LOOK OUT IT'S GONNA BLOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!

The casualties? Who knows! The sound? Defeaning! The taste? Danger. It is the pie of danger... and in TEN MINUTES IT IS GOING TO EXPLODE!

You are our only hope! Rewire the crust to the pudding, the berry goop to the tin plate, the custard to the detonator, the blue wire to the lemon meringue - before it kills the president!

Oh you are doing it all wrong! There's no time. We have to escape before it becomes even more delicious - dangerously delicious.

But there is no escape, you are too intrigued by the excitement of its fatal filling! With your first bite you're stickin your hand out the school bus window - so dangerous, don't you know what that did to Marty Lichtman in third grade! With your second bite you're speedin on a highway while talkin on your cell phone at the same time - and you aren't even using the complimentary headset! With your third bite you're hangin out in a smoke-filled bar - oh, don't you know that extended exposure to second-hand smoke can increase the risk of cancer! You try to stop yourself but it is too late, the sweet succulence of recklessness compels you to take one more bite AND THEN YOU EXPLOOOOODE!

An we're runnin past the fireball an fightin the terrorists an punchin out the spaceship an crash-landin on a missile made a nazi zombies an we got half a second to get into space before the danger! The danger of danger pie!

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posted by fafnir at 2:21 PM




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