Monday, April 18, 2005

The Pope is dead. Long live the Pope! - for the next Pope will be no feebly whiny old popey Pope. It will be the ultimate Pope, the supreme and most glorious Overpope! It will be Giblets the First: the first and only Gibpope.

"Oh but Giblets the Pope is not picked by Giblets he is picked by all the mini-popes at the Vatican." Insolent fools! Giblets has already infiltrated the conclave of cardinals using his clever Cardinal Francis Arinze costume - Giblets always knew it would come in handy some day! - and will soon seize control of the papacy through sheer Gibletsian will!

Giblets's first order of business as pope will be to clear out this old cardinal smell that's all over the Vatican. First thing next week we throw all cardinals to the slavering jackals! Also we need to restaff the jackal pits. Our current jackals are mangy and old and ill-suited to represent the glory of Giblets's church on earth, and clearly the reason why it has lost so much ground to secularism.

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posted by Giblets at 8:41 AM




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