Saturday, March 19, 2005

Giblets, surprisingly enough, is outraged! Giblets just returned from seeing the IMAX documentary "Volcanoes," hoping to calm his jangly nerves with the soothing sight of exploding mountains of magma, only to be incensed by the heresies against established Gibletsian doctrine contained within!

Not once did the film acknowledge that lava flows are created by Oblos the Fire Monkey at the earth's core, or that continental drift is caused by the armies of mole men who dance for Giblets's amusement! The movie also maintained the mad fiction that complex life evolved over billions of years according to natural selection instead of being assembled in the distant future by the Machine Lords of the Gibletarium! Madness and heresy! Shock and horror!

Giblets calls for a full boycott of "Volcanoes" by all right and proper Giblets-fearing people and the immediate burning of all apostates involved in its production! In the meantime Gilblets orders the making of decent, accurate documentaries based on the proven, scientific accounts of the origin of the universe found in the holy tome and autobiography, Giblets: The Man, the Myth, the Me.
posted by Giblets at 2:14 PM




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