Monday, November 22, 2004

So we were playin this new video game JFK Reloaded which is so cool! In it you get to play out the Kennedy assassination as the assassin!

Now the thing about JFK Reloaded is that it's pretty addictive. Sure it starts out easy with like a real slow-movin car but on the next coupla levels they start to speed up, an then a course you get the bulletproof vest Kennedys where you can only shoot em in the head. By the time you get to the round with Cyborg Kennedy your only real hope is to try an take out Jackie an John Connelly with the magic bullet an make it through on the bonus points. It definitely builds your respect for Lee Harvey Oswald, that's for sure.

Thing is that after a while our squishy little brains got desensitized to the idea a assassinatin JFKs. We'd hang out at the ol book depository more an more, Giblets would take pot shots at motorcades with his sniper rifle. Nobody was sposed to get hurt - not for REAL. But one day...

"Hey, is that John F. Kennedy comin up the street?" says me.
"I bet we can wing im," says Giblets.

We didn't MEAN to kill the dream of Camelot an forever destroy America's innocence! If only we had paid attention to the "Rated M for Mature" label! If only there were federal regulations in place to prevent such mature content from bein sold to impressionable minors like ourselves! If only - if only!

In the meantime we picked up a copy of HIROSHIMA: RENUKED!

discussion questions!

  • Is Super Mario Brothers responsible for the recent escalation of plumber-on-turtle violence in America? Plumber-on-mushroom violence? Discuss.

  • Sales of violent video games have lead to increased violence in our culture, but sales of Dead or Alive: Xtreme Beach Volleyball have not lead to increased playing of xtreme beach volleyball. Why is this?

  • Defend the following statement in 200 words or less: Leisure Suit Larry is a Christ figure.

  • You are a Democratic strategist looking for a gimmick to exploit the "values" vote. Will calling for a ban on violent video games be more effective or less effective than abolishing the NEA or decrying obscenity in broadcasting? Which swing demographics will you pick up? Which base demographics will you drop? Discuss this with the soulless pollster of your choice.
  • posted by fafnir at 1:59 PM




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