Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Much has been made lately of the notion that George Bush suffers from a "reality gap," that he annot accept "facts on the ground" in Iraq or in the war on terror, that he appears "insulated" or "oblivious" or "utterly divorced from reality," that his much-vaunted certainty is nothing more than a hardened and terrible refusal to confront any facts that conflict with his personal view of the world.

As usual, the usual crowd of scurrying, chicken-little liberals have recognized a basic truth while failing to comprehend it. Of course the President has rejected reality. How else is he to control it?

The President's most serious duty is not acting as head of the executive branch, or as commander-in-chief of the armed forces. It is as weaver of worlds. Reality is created by perception, as all enlightened beings understand, and it is the President's job to create this perception, through bold use of suggestion, propaganda, and outright deception. For if the President succeeds in changing enough minds - to believe, for example, that major combat operations in Iraq ended on May 1st, or that Iraq and Afghanistan are flowering democracies, or that the majority of his tax cuts went to the middle class - then that perception will alter the fabric of reality itself, replacing the base, lower reality - in which Saddam Hussein had no connection to al Qaeda, in which no weapons of mass destruction were ever located, in which Iran and North Korea continue to grow stronger and more dangerous, in which one thousand US troops and countless Iraqi civilians have died for a fool's errand - into a bright and glorious one in which noble American might has routed and purged the terrorist menace and made the world a safer place.

Alas, there are saboteurs in our midst, who would try to create an alternate perception - to reinforce base, merely apparent reality over the President's higher, True Reality, to criticize the President - and therefore embolden America's enemies by helping to create a reality in which those enemies are succeeding. These opponents of Truth - liberal Bush-haters, international bureaucrats, former national security experts, journalists, American troops - must be routed before they can use the mystical, reality-warping power of words to bend the world into one that resembles the world we see instead of the world George Bush tells us he sees. The best way for free people to combat this is to lend potency to the President's reality - by creating it with words of their own.

The Medium Lobster will begin this noble work with the following: Victory is declared in Iraq. Indeed, it was declared on May 1, 2003. From this day forth, May 1 shall be a new national holiday: V-I Day, for Victory in Iraq. The Medium Lobster looks forward not only to the peaceful democracy of Iraq's peaceful transition to democracy, but to November 3, which, I understand, will be declared by the President to be V-T day - Victory over Terror, when the United States will stand victorious over its most dangerous enemies.

Once again, the Medium Lobster must wonder of John Kerry - a so-called "realist," one obsessed with facts and figures, with the reality of "facts on the ground" - is this a man Americans should trust with their country? Or is this a man not bold enough - not strong enough - to repeatedly reject the evidence of his senses? The Medium Lobster leaves the answer with you, while he celebrates the continuing freedom and security of the people of Iraq.
posted by the Medium Lobster at 8:57 AM



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