Sunday, April 11, 2004

Giblets has always had a complex relationship with God. On the one hand Giblets sympathizes with God; I too know the distant loneliness of being a mighty sovereign relatively unknown to billions of my subjects. On the other hand Giblets is angry with God's insolence: Create substance ex nihilo for Giblets, God! Create substance ex nihilo for Giblets NOOOOOOOOOW!

So Giblets does not know how to react to, say, Easter. Redemption and forgiveness do not do much for me because why would Giblets need redemption and forgiveness, after all, he is Giblets! That said, there is one thing about God Giblets can really get into, and that is this notion of annihilating the insolent in fiery destruction at the end of the world.

I found out about God's personal plan for me and the annihilation of mankind through the Left Behind series. But because Giblets does not bother himself with "conventional" reading, Giblets read Left Behind: The Graphic Novel and the children's series Left Behind: The Kids. Just because you are a confused pre-adolescent just coming to grips with new feelings and new situations doesn't mean you're not old enough to be forcibly drawn into a battle of good-versus-evil between the angelic forces of righteous destruction and the Satanic new world order of the Antichrist's U.N.-based one-world kingdom.

But the problem is, when is this Armageddon thing gonna go down? Giblets has been waiting for it for like forever, for days even. There are countless evil people still alive and undamned, from terrorists to fools who do not serve Giblets to ugly people. How long, O Lord, how long shall the wicked triumph?

Today the Pope talked about "fighting terror with love:"
"May the culture of life and love render vain the logic of death," he said.

He specifically urged world leaders and global institutions to end conflict in Iraq, the Holy Land and Africa.
Sounds pretty soft to me for a guy who is supposed to be looking forward to the the falling of the star Wormwood, the destruction of every blade of green grass, and the unleashing of the rider on the pale horse whose name is Death. Sounds to Giblets like the Pope's gettin' a little soft on the likes of Satan. Maybe the Pope better start asking himself whose side he's on anyway.

For that matter whose side is God on, anyway? Why is his Son the "Prince of Peace"? He got some kind of conflict of interest here? I look back on two thousand years, I see a lot of genocide, a lot of famine and pestilence, not enough world-ending. Well, God, if you're not up to the task, maybe you should just step aside and let some other folks handle the job. I think there'd be plenty of people who'd be more than willing.
posted by Giblets at 3:12 PM



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