Sunday, January 18, 2004

Giblets is at a conference of the Young Republicans. They are here to remind me that they have a caucus too. They are all very pro-Bush. I suppose they are worried that Bush might lose the caucus to such Republican challengers as Blake Ashby and Bill Wyatt.

Giblet is here for their food. When one of them comes up to me at the buffet table where I am stuffing a sack full of mini-quiches and clams I shout at it, "Bow to Giblets! All feed Giblets! Bow to Giblets! All food for Giblets!" It succumbs to my Gibletsness, and brings me more punch. Before long they are all under my sway as I tell them of my bold platform. "There will be no more taxes in the reign of Giblets," I say. "All will belong to Giblets and thus the tax code will become redundant, for why should Giblets tax Giblets?" Big applause. "There will be no more United Nations," I tell them. "There will be only a United Nations of Giblets!" Even more applause. These are pliable creatures. Giblets could use them. But Giblets is here as an objective reporter to record the stupidity of all these stupid people, and interfering in their habits would be wrong.

Next Giblets gets to meet a candidate. Will he win Giblets's support? Or will he be lame and stupid and insolent?
posted by Giblets at 2:48 PM



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