Wednesday, December 17, 2003

Condition: Mustard

We have run out of mustard. How am I gonna eat these hot dogs? I have so many hot dogs to eat. You just cant eat hot dogs without mustard, it's not right.

I have asked Giblets about my mustard. "Giblets doesn't care about your mustard," says Giblets. Giblets has become cold and uncaring. His newfound power over Civilization 3 has corrupted him. I have asked Chris about my mustard. "No dice," says Chris. Enough of your gambling addiction Chris! I need my mustard! I have written The Medium Lobster about my mustard. "The mustard is still there," says the Medium Lobster. "But you fail to see it - with your sadly linear perception." Lousy Medium Lobster.

Can you help me get my mustard? I prefer French's Classic Yellow. Please get some and mail it to Fafnir at The Freedom Fortress at Providence, RI. You can't miss it - it is a fortress of freedom.

Oh - and Saddam Hussein is still captured. But what about Santa Claus? It is gettin frighteningly close to Christmas and he still roams free!
posted by fafnir at 11:07 AM



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